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Raking Poop and Other Things to Appreciate While I Still Can

"Practice an attitude of gratitude." The first time I heard that saying I was sitting in an AA meeting. No, I'm not a good enough drinker to qualify for membership. But my mom was! My mother was practically paralyzed by the thought of interacting with others – even those who'd traveled down some of the… Continue reading Raking Poop and Other Things to Appreciate While I Still Can

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Opportunities look a lot like work, and other sage advice from an unlikely source

I think Chris "Ashton" Kutcher may have finally grown up. While some of Kutcher's words to the Teen Choice Awards audience may have fallen on deaf ears (because they were attached to screaming teenage girls), it was great to hear him tell teens that work is the path to opportunity, to not buy into the… Continue reading Opportunities look a lot like work, and other sage advice from an unlikely source

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James Altucher thinks you’re brainwashed

Who brainwashed you? Parents, friends, teachers, government, media, entertainment, advertising, the education system, the banking system, and organized religion. In that order although they are all interrelated. ...It’s a massive recruiting machine that tries to keep us from our true happiness by redefining happiness in various ways that are inaccurate and even harmful. From James… Continue reading James Altucher thinks you’re brainwashed

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You Should Date An Illiterate Girl

Caution: May cause emotional distress in individuals unaccustomed to feeling passionate about anything.

Thought Catalog

Date a girl who doesn’t read. Find her in the weary squalor of a Midwestern bar. Find her in the smoke, drunken sweat, and varicolored light of an upscale nightclub. Wherever you find her, find her smiling. Make sure that it lingers when the people that are talking to her look away. Engage her with unsentimental trivialities. Use pick-up lines and laugh inwardly. Take her outside when the night overstays its welcome. Ignore the palpable weight of fatigue. Kiss her in the rain under the weak glow of a streetlamp because you’ve seen it in film. Remark at its lack of significance. Take her to your apartment. Dispatch with making love. Fuck her.

Let the anxious contract you’ve unwittingly written evolve slowly and uncomfortably into a relationship. Find shared interests and common ground like sushi, and folk music. Build an impenetrable bastion upon that ground. Make it sacred. Retreat into…

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